The Sci-Fi Guide to Dissertation Writing

The Sci-Fi Guide to Dissertation Writing

By:  To Do: Dissertation


For all you dissertation writing sci-fi fans out there, I know these quotes have probably already brought you encouragement.  For everyone else, consider the following motivational statements from famous science fiction texts:

“Roads? Where we’re going we don’t need roads.” (Doc Brown, Back to the Future)
No matter how many papers you’ve written, writing a long manuscript like the dissertation will test your writing and thinking skills in new ways.  There will be no road map for how to proceed.  There won’t even by any roads to mark your path.  The whole point of your dissertation is that it is uncharted territory.

“Do or do not.  There is no try.” (Yoda, Empire Strikes Back)
The bottom line is that you are going to have to write your dissertation in the end.  No one else can do it for you.  Stop procrastinating.  Stop feeling sorry for yourself.  Just write it.  Sit down.  Pick up a pen.  Power up your computer.  Start stringing some words together.  You’ll finish it faster than you think.

“Life? Don’t talk to me about life!” (Marvin the Paranoid Android, The Hitchhiker’s Guide to the Galaxy)
The dissertation doesn’t have to be isolating if you don’t want it to be, but there may be times that you choose to isolate yourself so that you can forge ahead.  If you do choose to focus on your dissertation at the expense of some other aspects of your life, just remember that your dissertation won’t last forever.

“To boldly go where no one has gone before.” (Star Trek)
Take pride in the uniqueness of your dissertation.  You are creating a new path in the academic wilderness.  Or, if you prefer, the academic galaxy.  Have courage, be bold, and trust your instincts.  You are the best person to be working on your project – no one can write it like you can!

“There is no spoon.” (Neo, The Matrix)
Whatever you thought the dissertation was – it’s not.  Think beyond the words on the page, the degree, and the hoop-jumping.  You dissertation is so much more than that.  Once you give up your preconceived notions, including all those fears and anxieties, you’ll succeed.

Discover Monaghan! Or don't. No one will really care.

Anyone visiting Ireland should definitely check out this video on YouTube and then go check out the town of Monaghan!!! (Or don't, whatever.)

Discover Monaghan - The Fun ENDS Here
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2H13TtWLZTA

And while you're at it, enjoy my play-by-play facebook chat conversation with the creator of "Discover Monaghan," eviltoaster3 (AKA Stephen). My comments = bold ; His responses = ((italics))


--- Begin Film ---

a duck!

the church!

a dump or truck site or something!
((Ah great, live commentary. This should prove to be amusing.))

it IS the little town on the way to Dublin!
((I think that sentence would be much much better if you had of capitalised the the instead of the is.))

I like the looks of the mental hospital - could be cozy
((And apparently, that should be mental institution...))

ah - in need of some politically correct correction are we?

MY town has a hole in the ground too!
((Yeah but that's probably from a meteor or explosion or something. That one is from someone's wise idea to build an underground carpark and then go bankrupt halfway through it.))

why is the roundabout 'magic'?
((I actually have no idea, hence the inverted commas.))

ah the ole waterless swimming hole
((It's closed because the roof was caving in. No joke.))

--- Brief interruption for trip to Mason's for drinking and debauchery.
Good Times!
End of Interruption!! ---

From Monaghan's gift shop of used bottles to "should you injure yourself" = nice segue!
(( Well you see, there's been controversy here about our hospital continuously losing services for years now and I've been informed that one of the alternative hospitals I mentioned is getting closed as well. ))

Classy is defined by a bar named the "lost and found"
(( Lost and Found closed and moved 5 miles over the border so they could sell drink cheaper. Ironically, it actually was the best pub here and it probably was the classiest too. ))


aaaaand creepy ending - who's that wacko sitting on the church steps anyway?!
(( No one has gotten what the end references. It's a bit of an obscure movie but still...and I suppose I am a bit of a wacko. ))


-- End Film --


P.S. Can't wait till my parents get here for our Ireland road trip - absolutely spending time in Monaghan!!!! I'll let you know when :):)
(( Yes the offer to come here still stands although I'm surprised you would after watching that video. ))

(( P.S. If you really want to show your love then you should post the video to your page or blog or something!! ))

Done and done!

Internet commenting...

I have to say that, providing I am in good humour, I thoroughly enjoy the comments you find online underneath articles, blogs, and video clips. Generally speaking they are funny and I have more than once laughed aloud in great merriment. This is not because they are meant to be funny. In fact I have noticed that the majority of people who make comments online are incredibly serious about the points that they wish to make. Indeed, I enjoy reading comments (especially on YouTube) because of their absolute stupidity.

This is not a blog about poor grammar, so don't run and hide your poor spelling from the grammar Nazis. Although the online grammar issue is a sore spot with me, I am content to allow the world to fall into a pit of poor punctuation. This way my own works appear similar to that of an elevated scholar, which is fine by me. The humorous comments that I am talking about today are the not-always-obvious 'duh' moments that go unremarked upon out of pity and sometimes concern for the obvious brain fart that has occurred.

Case in point, today I noticed a comment under a subtitled video that asked:
"i would like to know if this epi is from spain"
The up-loader kindly replied:
"This is a Catalan show."  (Note the proper use of capitals and punctuation - kudos up-loader!)
To which our stunningly intelligent inquirer responded:
"Catalan? Where is that from?"  (Again I note punctuation. At least the kid is learning something!)

Don't take me to be some grammar-obsessed cartographer who takes personal offence at the slightest geographical question, but there is a bit of humour in that one has to admit. Even so, this is not where I find the question most amusing. Granted I think it should be obvious that Catalan programming would be from Catalonia (or "Catalunya" as our ever-so-patient up-loader replied). But if geography is not your strong point and you have never heard of such a place as Catalonia, then I have to wonder why you feel it necessary to ask such questions through the medium that is the YouTube comment channel when there is a Google search engine at your fingertips!

If you can watch a YouTube video and leave a comment, then you can use a search engine. I don't think that I am overstepping my abilities in making that assumption. The best part of these questions is that they are being asked to begin with. The internet is a powerful tool, yet it appears that its myriad of uses are being ignored by many members of the general public. These comment-writers, instead of properly utilizing said tool, appear to be turning it upside down, smelling it, and concluding that it must only exist to provide pretty colours and images rather than have a functional use.

Of course painfully obvious questions and moments of temporary loss of brain function are both funny and forgivable. My friends have learned not to get me started on those individuals who choose to make comments based upon their own particular political, religious, or ethnic worldview. In my opinion these people should keep comments to themselves. However, it would be overly hypocritical of me to challenge the value of free speech in an online blog so I will just leave such a topic alone. It's probably for the best anyway.